So I have a hot tub. I love my hot tub. My hot tub used to make me feel wonderful. Some days my hot tub still relaxes me and makes me feel wonderful. Unfortunately, recently my hot tub has also begun to produce pain flares in my feet and legs. For anyone who doesn't understand what a CRPS flare feels like, have you ever had hot grease spill on your hand? A CRPS flare feels kind of like that sensation after the initial first burst of pain. Its kind of like that burning simmer that you cannot cool down and you cannot escape from, but you really wish you could. You try in vain to move in a way to alleviate the pain, but no matter which way you turn, or which position you try, the pain is always there. Unlike the pain from a stove burn, there is no dissipation. The pain does not taper off and no ointment gives you relief.
I got into the hot tub a few nights ago hoping it would help relax and make me feel better. After just a few minutes, I knew I was in trouble. I exited the hot tub and got into the shower. I was immensely pleased that I have a shower chair that allows me to sit down because I could not hold myself up on my feet. I cried in the shower where no one could see me. I did manage to get myself out and dressed, and then went and crawled into my husband's lap. (My happy place).
I wish someone understood the reason behind this condition. I wish there were more research dollars being spent finding a cure, or at the least some real treatments. I guess until there are, I will continue to push on as best as I can. I do believe that we are not given challenges we are not able to overcome, but some days I do pray harder for guidance and assistance because I'm not sure how much longer before I fall.
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